Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Tuesday Tantrum - - Vol. 12


Los Angeles:  

The Los Angeles Lakers and the Denver Nuggets square off tonight in what should be an epic, tatted up, torrid seven-game series. The Lakers are the finesse, sexy, flashy, "look at us" team and the Nuggets have more ink than the Sunday New York Times. Those aspects are a recipe for "dot edu guy" and "tinfoil on my head" guy, because you know these games are going to be close and fans will start going ape nuts with the referees.  

Though I'm not a conspiracy guy, Phil Jackson's team better wake up. Andrew Bynum has shown is immaturity, Lamar Odom is that guy that looks good in the front hotel lobby, but never performs to his hype (GM's drool over players like these, then they falter), and Pau Gasol has been softer than a ball of yarn. His new nickname- "The Soft Pretzel Delight." Yes, Gasol gets his points and rebounds, but he needs to learn how to play physical defense in the lane. He let a bunch of boarder line D-League players drive on him last series (Chuck Hayes, Von Wafer, and Carl Landry). Hey Pau, wake the hell up. You made it to the Western Conference Finals and your not playing YMCA players anymore. The Nuggets are grown men that look like a bunch of Chopper motorcycle riders that want to obliterate everything in site. That being said, when this L.A. team wants to play, they'll play. But I cannot wait for "conspiracy theory guy" or "blame the ref guy" start criticizing the officiating. Let the saga begin...  

Bud Selig:  

Congratulations to Major League Baseball and Mr. Selig. They finally got "something" right. After adjusting the starting times of the 2009 World Series, I would like to give a round of applause to Commissioner Bud Selig. The games have been moved up approximately 40-to-50 minutes earlier. Yay.  

Lets be honest. The only people that were up for last years World Series were college kids, vampires, and NBA beat writers. It was idiotic and totally unnecessary to start games at 8:45 last year and that's a fact. Unlike the NFL, where the Superbowl is kicked off by 6:30 p.m., Major League Baseball did not have their "main event" start until most people were reading their Bible scriptures and closing their eyes. So lets give a big HALLELUJAH to baseball fans around the country. It killed baseball for so long and facts prove the significant effect late starting times had. 16-26 year-olds do not watch as much baseball as their dad. Once again, hail to all in the baseball family.  

Boston:  

Batting in the third spot as a DH for the Boston Red Sox, slugging a whopping .208 for the season with 34 hits with 130 at bats, weighing in at a sweltering 230 pounds... DAVID ORTIZ is wilting. When your the second highest paid "dude" on the team ($13,000,000), you should not go 0-for-7 and leave twelve runners on base EVER as Big Papi did last Thursday in a 4-5 loss to the Anaheim Angels.  

There are three scenarios that I would like to propose.  
1) He is missing Manny Ramirez that bad. With Manny in the lineup, Ortiz was launching balls all over the place since the 2001 year (when Manny got to Boston). 39,47,40,29,52, and 30. Those are how many home runs Big Papi hit with Manny in the lineup. He's yet to blast one in the 2009 season. A donut in the "HR" column does not sit well with a prominent franchise.  
2) Cough "ROIDS!" Cough cough cough... "jeesh," excuse me. Steroids... aachu! Bless you. Cough cough cough. With all the steroid chaos going on this year, he may be deteriorating right in front of our eyes.  

ORRR....  

3) Bib Papi may be just eroding at the age of 33. Wer see it in the NBA, the NFL, and even in MLB... big guys have lots of problems with their bodies. Ortiz's prime may be gone forever. He could be flushing his year/career down the toilet with this performance.  

**My advice: Get the cob webs out of your system before the All-Star break and have a fantastic second half of the season, the Bo Sox fans will completely forget about it... they just want another ring.  

**The Million Dollar Question: OVER or UNDER 20 homers for David Ortiz?

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

TUesday Tantrum - - Vol. 11


Los Angeles:

Phil Jackon receives entirely too much criticism these days. He's the only coach that could win nine NBA Titles, as he has, and be ridiculed for the "little things." So what if the man has been lucky enough to have Michael Jordan and Kobe Bryant, so didn't Del Harris and Doug Collins. He took a team that was 31-19 in 1998-1999 and won 67 games six months later. He's made Pau Gasol a "star," somehow manufactured an "I'm so irrelevant, I need to be in the D-League" Shannon Brown a suitable player in the stacked L.A. roster, and not to mention that he has actually won (with Jordan and Pippen and Kobe and Shaq), unlike Harris or Collins.

Listen, if you have a higher IQ than an avocado, then you should realize that it is ludicrous to think that Phil Jackson is overrated. "See ya" in the NBA Finals Cleveland. Be prepared to lose in five because when Kobe laces up his "low-top Kobe IV's" and Andrew Bynum eventually wakes up from Hugh Hefner's Playboy Mansion, L.A. will be ready to roll. Everyone can stick to their Denver Nuggets prediction because they are playing the most efficient basketball, but I will keep my reservations (that I've had since October -- jmccracken.blog.com/2008/10/) for a team that has proven themselves over the past decade.

Clemons:

If anyone listened to the "Mike and Mike In The Morning" radio show this morning, you'll know where I am going with this...

This guy is unbelievable. As fans, we are getting hosed. Roger Clemons must assume that "we" are all just a bunch of stupid idiots. I'm talking everybody too. Not just the fans, but teammates, media, agents, trainers, and even God (I think) - he thinks we're all dumb.

He's got this new PR agent and he clearly butchered this statement after being asked why we should believe he has never taking any substances. "Common sense, our family has a history of heart conditions... my stepdad died of a heart attack...I mean it'd be suicidal for me to take any of these dangerous drugs" Uhhh, Roger, your stepdad had a heart attack? You can't merry into heart disease You take vowels Roger. You do not take her DNA. What a moronic thing to say. That's like saying, "Her dad had two seven-foot tall kids, my kids are going to be huge." (Haha)... pathetic.

He tries to "play" us like a Jeff Dunham puppet show. What a horrible, disgusting liar. Not on is he greasier than a fast food apron, but he lied to wis wife for years. If he can lie to Debbie, he can certainly lie to you. Like him or not, he's a total buffoon.